Don’t Cha
In case you, along with most of America, hadn't heard the Pussycat Dolls have a brand new lineup. The original girls are all gone, except Nicole, of course, replaced by a whole new set of booty-shakers whose names and faces you won't remember either.
Nicole Scherzinger initially joined the Pussycat Dolls because they were lacking a strong lead vocalist, which really means "The bitches we have can't carry a tune". Nicole had earlier been in the group Eden's Crush, which if you were a teenager in the hey-day of TRL like I was, you remember was put together on the reality competition show "Popstars" on the WB. The first Pussycat Dolls album was completely recorded by Nicole. She sang lead, backup and everything in between. In the videos the rest of the Dolls just lip-synched along. I know, a real shocker in today's pop music.
When the CW started airing Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search For the Next Doll, I watched each week with great anticipation to find out who the next Doll would be. It wasn't widely publicized but the new Doll was being brought in to take Nicole's place as she would be leaving to record a solo album. Nicole's role in the Pussycat Dolls was originally meant to be a temporary one. A stepping stone to launch her career after the failure of Eden's Crush. The winner turned down her spot and Nicole's solo album never actually came out - even after releasing 4 singles. Sorry, Nicole but your first name is way too common for you to be known solely by it and your last name is too damn hard to pronounce. It's not like you could pull a Beyoncé and let people know "it rhymes with fianceé" when you first came out. In fact, you'd probably have better luck with a solo album if you actually went by the name Nicole From the Pussycat Dolls. Let's face it, that's what you're forever going to be known as anyway. Just own it already. Do you think we would give a rat’s ass about Stefani Germanotta if she hadn’t taken the stage name Lady Gaga? No! We would have just said that chick with the weird name sure dresses funny and kept it moving.
The back-up Dolls grew tired of Nicole's preferential treatment in the group and were eventually thrown out for clashing with her. The official reason being "they left to pursue solo careers". Hate to break this to you ladies, but you won't have any. I mean, really, did any of you think that you were in the PCD because of your singing talent? Hell, after watching the Pussycat Dolls workout video for 20 minutes I had the dance moves to the entire chorus of "Don't Cha" memorized. Given a hot body, a fierce weave and another X-chromosome I could have been the next Pussycat Doll.
I'm not trying to kick you when you're down but let's face facts - You were put together as a group then someone else was brought in to record THE ENTIRE ALBUM. Did you not think something was off at that point? You were brought in because all of you were pretty and could dance. Remember back in 2008 when redheaded vixen Carmit Bachar left to record her solo album? Yeah, neither does anyone else.
